Something I got this in the mail this morning which I thought would be nice to share....
Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio
1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month. (note to self!!)
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone. (thanks for those who have lent me their shoulder to cry on)
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it. ( :) )
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it. (couldn't agree with this more!!)
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful. (does this include people too??)
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger. (but how much is strong enough?!)
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else 20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words 'In five years, will this matter?'
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone and everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time. (key word here is almost)
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles. (I have TWO!!.... )
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young. (depends who you are growin old with I guess..)
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come...
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.
45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
Life is too short to have regrets..... love unconditionally, forgive whole heartedly and live life the best we know how...In the end we are accountable for our own actions! :)
Wednesday, November 11, 2009
Monday, November 2, 2009
I am a proud mother.........
My Little Man had his concert last Saturday....I think I was more excited than he was about it. I just couldn't wait to see my Little Man on stage. Deep down I had my doubts that he would perform. I assumed it would be a repeat of what happen during the sports day..... but boy did he amaze me...
On the way to the concert with my Little Man. (check out the lipstick and rosy cheeks. It was so difficult to get him to wear make up!!)
His dance partner; Isha. Both looking a little lost!
Teacher Maria helping to get the kids in place....
My Little Man enjoying his performance..... 
Mummy's amazing Little Man.... I love you son!
The Family... minus a few important people in my life...you know who you are! :)
Check out Little Man's hair do!!! (he loved it cause he said it looks like Uncle Peter's hair!)I was glad mum and dad came along, though I missed the presence of one important person in my life. It is school activities like this that make me miss having an intact family for Mikhail. I do my best to provide the void he may have or feel. But I guess one person can never do the job which was meant for two.
However, my angel was amazing on stage.... he performed so well. And when he spotted me sitting at the front row taking pictures, he kept on blowing me kisses... that was my special moment with my son.....a bond only a mother can feel for her child. Allah has blessed me with an amazing child and I pray that He guides Mikhail on the right path all the time.
Little Man's Prayer for his Mummy......
As our nightly ritual goes, when I put Little Man to bed, he recites some verses from the Quran thanking Allah for his blessings. This is followed by his own little prayer, asking Allah for what he wants...... Last nights prayer amazed me... and brought tears to my eyes...
"Please Allah, Please don't let my amma (me) sleep alone anymore. She is sad and alone. Please find someone to sleep next to her so that I can sleep with Petha (grandma). Ameen"
This was my three and a half year old's prayer for me.... I was speechless and couldn't help tearing.... to which he wiped away my tears and said
"Don't cry amma.... I will sleep with you till you find someone to sleep next to you."
At such a tender age, he understands my feelings. He understands more then even some adults can. I really wonder what goes in his mind sometimes. I wish I could read his mind.
I am truly blessed with the most amazing son ever. I thank Allah for this blessing everyday.....
Friday, October 30, 2009
My Little Man and His Big Bump..
Little man gave me yet another heart stopping incident a few days ago....
After sending Mikhail to school on Tueday, I came home and was finishing up some paper work I had pending for the longest time. I was on Medical Leave that day as I was having a bad headache and the doctor said it looked as though I was coming down with an eye infection.
Around 10.30am, I got a call from his teacher Maria to tell me he had a fall in school but I had nothing to worry about. She was just informing me. I asked if he was okay and she reassured me there was nothing to worry about. 20 minutes later, his school called again. This time it was his principal, Michelle. She sounded very disturbed and urged me to pick Mikhail up and him to the clinic as the bump on his head was really huge. That got me worried. I rushed to the school, which thankfully was just a 3 minute drive away. I was shocked to see the size of the bump on his head. It was big. And he was in a lot of pain and couldn't keep his head up. I rushed him to the nearby clinic and Dr Surekha advised me to take him to the hospital to get a x-ray done.
By that point, I was so worried. My heart was beating so fast and I just didn't know who to turn to as my folks were away in Australia. I went home, got some milk and stuff for him and headed to the hospital. The only time I had felt this alone in my life was when he had a chicken bone stuck in his throat when he was 9 months old and had to go for emergency surgery. This time, it was even worse as I had no one around me this time. The last time, I at least had my family with me. This time it was just me alone.
At times like this, I yearn for someone I can depend on. For someone who will be by my side and take charge of everything while I console my little one. For someone to hold my hand and tell me everything will be okay. I hate having to be the strong one.... to keep my composed self when inside I am just breaking down. I hate having to keep my tears in when all I wanted to do was cry.... I hate having to do all this alone......
Before I sound ungrateful, I must thank my friends and My Beloved Trekkie for their concern and constant messages and calls to check on Little Man and I..... I am grateful to be blessed with such wonderful people who love and care for us......
I was so proud of Little Man though. He allowed the doctors to check him with minimal fuss. We got the x-ray done. And by Allah's grace and Mercy the doctor said he was fine. I would just need to observe him for the next 48 hours - to make sure he doesn't sleep too much or complain of headaches or nausea. Vomitting would be a sign that he would need further tests.
It is three days since it happened. He is back to his cheerful and chirpy self now! I am so thankful! But the feeling of panic and not being able to protect my son still haunts me. I would not have forgiven myself if anything did happen. But Allah is Merciful....and He sent His angels to protect my angel.....
p.s. obviously no photos for this blog.... in my panic, I didnt take any of his huge bump...!!
After sending Mikhail to school on Tueday, I came home and was finishing up some paper work I had pending for the longest time. I was on Medical Leave that day as I was having a bad headache and the doctor said it looked as though I was coming down with an eye infection.
Around 10.30am, I got a call from his teacher Maria to tell me he had a fall in school but I had nothing to worry about. She was just informing me. I asked if he was okay and she reassured me there was nothing to worry about. 20 minutes later, his school called again. This time it was his principal, Michelle. She sounded very disturbed and urged me to pick Mikhail up and him to the clinic as the bump on his head was really huge. That got me worried. I rushed to the school, which thankfully was just a 3 minute drive away. I was shocked to see the size of the bump on his head. It was big. And he was in a lot of pain and couldn't keep his head up. I rushed him to the nearby clinic and Dr Surekha advised me to take him to the hospital to get a x-ray done.
By that point, I was so worried. My heart was beating so fast and I just didn't know who to turn to as my folks were away in Australia. I went home, got some milk and stuff for him and headed to the hospital. The only time I had felt this alone in my life was when he had a chicken bone stuck in his throat when he was 9 months old and had to go for emergency surgery. This time, it was even worse as I had no one around me this time. The last time, I at least had my family with me. This time it was just me alone.
At times like this, I yearn for someone I can depend on. For someone who will be by my side and take charge of everything while I console my little one. For someone to hold my hand and tell me everything will be okay. I hate having to be the strong one.... to keep my composed self when inside I am just breaking down. I hate having to keep my tears in when all I wanted to do was cry.... I hate having to do all this alone......
Before I sound ungrateful, I must thank my friends and My Beloved Trekkie for their concern and constant messages and calls to check on Little Man and I..... I am grateful to be blessed with such wonderful people who love and care for us......
I was so proud of Little Man though. He allowed the doctors to check him with minimal fuss. We got the x-ray done. And by Allah's grace and Mercy the doctor said he was fine. I would just need to observe him for the next 48 hours - to make sure he doesn't sleep too much or complain of headaches or nausea. Vomitting would be a sign that he would need further tests.
It is three days since it happened. He is back to his cheerful and chirpy self now! I am so thankful! But the feeling of panic and not being able to protect my son still haunts me. I would not have forgiven myself if anything did happen. But Allah is Merciful....and He sent His angels to protect my angel.....
p.s. obviously no photos for this blog.... in my panic, I didnt take any of his huge bump...!!
Monday, October 12, 2009
Forgive.... but do you forget?
Forgiving is a virtue not many can do. When you have been hurt so badly, how do you look someone in the eye and say "I forgive you" and truly mean it? Does forgiving really take the pain away?
In the past few years, I have been hurt.... a few times... by friends, colleagues and people I love. I found it difficult to forgive. My mum says I trust to easily and assume everyone has a good heart. Boy, was I wrong....I learnt my lessons the hard way... I learnt it throughheart break, shattered hopes, disapointments and broken promises.... I am slowly learning to approach everything in circumspect. (My Trekkie's favourite word!! Lawyers!!). But the best lesson I am learning is to forgive and move on holding no grudge against the people who have wronged me. I believe, God is a far better judge then I will ever be....
“If you punish, then punish with the like of that wherewith you were afflicted. But if you endure patiently, indeed it is better for the patient. Endure you patiently. Your patience is not except through the help of Allah.” (an-Nahl:126-127)
Islam emphasizes justice and punishment of the wrong doers, but it equally strongly emphasizes mercy, kindness and love. Justice, law and order are necessary for the maintenance of a social order, but there is also a need for forgiveness to heal the wounds and to restore good relations between the people.
Which such profound teachings, I humbled myself to learn to forgive those who have wronged me... whether they seek it or not... I cleared my heart of all grudge and hate.... but I guess I may never forget the hurt.... or pehaps time will heal..... I also strive to seek forgiveness from those whom I have wronged be it untentional or not.. I think the world will be a much better place if we all learn to forgive.... forgetting the hurt... that's a story for another time... ;)
In the past few years, I have been hurt.... a few times... by friends, colleagues and people I love. I found it difficult to forgive. My mum says I trust to easily and assume everyone has a good heart. Boy, was I wrong....I learnt my lessons the hard way... I learnt it throughheart break, shattered hopes, disapointments and broken promises.... I am slowly learning to approach everything in circumspect. (My Trekkie's favourite word!! Lawyers!!). But the best lesson I am learning is to forgive and move on holding no grudge against the people who have wronged me. I believe, God is a far better judge then I will ever be....
In Islam we are taught that Allah Almighty has granted intellect to human beings and with intellect come great responsibilities. Little children are not held responsible for their actions, as their intellect are not yet developed. And same goes for those of unsound mind. Part of being human is that we make mistakes. Sometime, mistakes are made without deliberation and intention. But sometimes we knowingly and deliberately sin and do wrong to others.
Islam speaks about two aspects of forgiveness; to seek Allah’s forgiveness and to seek forgiveness from those we have wronged. We need both!
Allah almighty is ever forgiving and a few of his many names in the Quran relate to his Mercy and forgiveness…
The Qur’an teaches that Allah is a Judge and He also punishes, but Allah is not bound to punish. The justice of Allah, according to The Qur’an is that Allah does not and will not inflict undue punishment on any person. He will not ignore the good of any person. But if He wishes to forgive any sinner, He has full freedom to do that. His mercy is unlimited and His love is infinite.
Seeking forgiveness from those whom we have wronged is just as important. We cannot expect Allah’s forgiveness unless we also forgive those who do wrong to us. Forgiving each other, even forgiving one’s enemies is one of the most important Islamic teachings.
Islam speaks about two aspects of forgiveness; to seek Allah’s forgiveness and to seek forgiveness from those we have wronged. We need both!
Allah almighty is ever forgiving and a few of his many names in the Quran relate to his Mercy and forgiveness…
The Qur’an teaches that Allah is a Judge and He also punishes, but Allah is not bound to punish. The justice of Allah, according to The Qur’an is that Allah does not and will not inflict undue punishment on any person. He will not ignore the good of any person. But if He wishes to forgive any sinner, He has full freedom to do that. His mercy is unlimited and His love is infinite.
Seeking forgiveness from those whom we have wronged is just as important. We cannot expect Allah’s forgiveness unless we also forgive those who do wrong to us. Forgiving each other, even forgiving one’s enemies is one of the most important Islamic teachings.
“If you punish, then punish with the like of that wherewith you were afflicted. But if you endure patiently, indeed it is better for the patient. Endure you patiently. Your patience is not except through the help of Allah.” (an-Nahl:126-127)
Islam emphasizes justice and punishment of the wrong doers, but it equally strongly emphasizes mercy, kindness and love. Justice, law and order are necessary for the maintenance of a social order, but there is also a need for forgiveness to heal the wounds and to restore good relations between the people.
Which such profound teachings, I humbled myself to learn to forgive those who have wronged me... whether they seek it or not... I cleared my heart of all grudge and hate.... but I guess I may never forget the hurt.... or pehaps time will heal..... I also strive to seek forgiveness from those whom I have wronged be it untentional or not.. I think the world will be a much better place if we all learn to forgive.... forgetting the hurt... that's a story for another time... ;)
“to err is human and to forgive is divine.”
Wednesday, October 7, 2009
The journey called life....
Sometimes I wonder what life has in store for me. These few years have been very trying times for me. I just wonder when will all this end. Is it destiny that from now on I will be faced with challenges? I must admit I am blessed in a lot of ways and I have lots to be thankful and grateful about. But I still do feel empty with no sense of belonging at times. Is it something I am doing to myself? Wallowing in self pity of my failed relationships and problems in life? Has such bad and hurtful experiences left me so skeptical bout things that at times the blessings laid in front of me goes unappreciated? I strive to overcome such negativity. I strive to be a better person for my son, my parents and for the Trekkie I love... :)
My last work experience with someone I trusted, the person I worked for ended in mere months with such negativity that it was beyond my comprehension how the human mind works. Why are there people in this world who do not have the simple decency or compassion? When do humans seize to have human like feelings? God has made us the supreme beings comparatively to animals. He has given us the ability to reason and think and to make calculated decisions? But how is it that some people just choose to make the life of the other person miserable and be able to sleep at night? Why is it that humans these days act more like animals then they do humans? What has happened to honesty and trust?
I was down for days wondering what I did so wrong for me to cross paths with such vile people. My Trekkie was getting pretty fed up of my crying and my depression. My Trekkie was going through a rough time too and I guess hearing me cry night after night didn't help the situation! Sorry dear!!
One night, out of utter desperation to find some answers, I confided in my parents. I asked them why has my journey in life become so rocky. I just really want a break. To which my father gave me his long winded tales of how hard his life was, which honestly, annoyed me even more. But mum as usual, with her soft gentle approach reassured me that good things will come. I just need to keep faith in God, and continue to prayer diligently. She told me, if God doesn't answer my prayers, it doesn't mean He is not hearing them, He probably thinks it is not the best for me. As cliche as it sounded, it kind of made me feel better. I guess sometimes, it is words of comfort and reassurance that helps us get through the bad times.
Life has its up and downs I guess, last week was a down for me, but it is getting better. It will improve. I should stay strong and positive.... after all, there are so many people around me who love and care for me; as I love and care for them....
My last work experience with someone I trusted, the person I worked for ended in mere months with such negativity that it was beyond my comprehension how the human mind works. Why are there people in this world who do not have the simple decency or compassion? When do humans seize to have human like feelings? God has made us the supreme beings comparatively to animals. He has given us the ability to reason and think and to make calculated decisions? But how is it that some people just choose to make the life of the other person miserable and be able to sleep at night? Why is it that humans these days act more like animals then they do humans? What has happened to honesty and trust?
I was down for days wondering what I did so wrong for me to cross paths with such vile people. My Trekkie was getting pretty fed up of my crying and my depression. My Trekkie was going through a rough time too and I guess hearing me cry night after night didn't help the situation! Sorry dear!!
One night, out of utter desperation to find some answers, I confided in my parents. I asked them why has my journey in life become so rocky. I just really want a break. To which my father gave me his long winded tales of how hard his life was, which honestly, annoyed me even more. But mum as usual, with her soft gentle approach reassured me that good things will come. I just need to keep faith in God, and continue to prayer diligently. She told me, if God doesn't answer my prayers, it doesn't mean He is not hearing them, He probably thinks it is not the best for me. As cliche as it sounded, it kind of made me feel better. I guess sometimes, it is words of comfort and reassurance that helps us get through the bad times.
Life has its up and downs I guess, last week was a down for me, but it is getting better. It will improve. I should stay strong and positive.... after all, there are so many people around me who love and care for me; as I love and care for them....
Thursday, July 30, 2009
Episode 2 : The people who matter in my life.....
My Angel.....Mikhail Ahmed....born 8 February 2006 at 10.05am....
He came into my life just three and a half years ago but my love for this little boy, my son, is unconditional and unmeasureable!
I found out I was pregnant on June 30th, 2005. I was nervous when I realised I was late and a very dear friend to me then, who happen to be my colleague too persuaded me to get a pregnancy test done.... we were like two teenagers at KLCC Guardian trying to choose one of those pregnancy kits... Heck, i chose the cheapest one on the shelf, paid for it and it took me another 2 hours till I got the courage to use it!
Something in me felt different, I knew I was pregnant, I just need the stick to show two lines... and it did! I was in tears, tears of joy. I called my friend/colleague (yes, she was the first to know). I was in tears and she came rushing down. I was happy.... and she shared that moment of joy with me.
The months to come was filled with mixed emotions, the first 4 months were trying, with my constant vomiting and nausea, but I had the comforts of a husband. After that he left for another woman. Though I was devastated beyond belief, I had to keep my spirits up, I had to be strong for my little boy. I couldn't help but imagine what he would look like - how his little fingers and toes will look like. I refused a 3D scan as I felt it was all to high tech for me. As long as the baby was growing fine, and the doctors did not see anything to worry about, I wasn't going to do it.
My life changed on 8 February 2006 at exactly 10.05am. I heard the first cry from my son... As cliche as it may sound, it was music to my ears! I cried... (yes I cry a lot!).... I had so much of mixed emotions, but I cried.....
The journey after has been one filled with adventure of trials and tribulations, of joy and laugher and most of all a journey filled with love. Despite the circumstances surrounding my pregnancy and child birth was not the most desirable; the end result was more than I could imagine. I would never trade anything in the world for this little boy who has become one (of two) of the lights of my life, my silver lining on a cloudy day and my reason to smile....
Mummy loves u dearly my little peanut....
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